Second Life, the wild west of the “metaverse” often requires the ability to acclimate to an idiosyncratic culture and complex jargon. How do you know when you have passed into the realm of the accomplished? That you have mastered enough of the culture to blend in? One or more of the following have happened or probably apply….

1 ) Your think your spouse and children are actly strangely. Rathar than admit you have a problem, the most logical conclusion must be they have been replaced by someone’s ALTs.

2 ) A new resident pulls the most offensive object they can from a freebie box, in this case a set of realistic sculpty canine genitals, and screams. You do not even bat an eye let alone flinch and keep looking for a decent skin. Your friend, a scripter, examines the miniature build and quickly fashions it into a gun.

3 ) Ruth is no longer a name or a book of the Bible, but an unfortunate, yet curable disease where you become a pseudo-hermaphrodite with extremely poor fashion sense. The only cure is a re-bake. This operation requires no flour, sugar, or yeast.

4 ) Getting from here to there becomes a TP while AFK remains AFK, OK is and always will be- KK.

5 ) Sit and push are not activities for a porch swing, but defensive and offensive modes.

6 ) You are concerned about privacy at your private beach front property because of the recent number of invisible tortured prims named _sand_ turning up on your zero mass scanner.

7 ) You see two people dancing poorly in real life and mentally access channel one and think the word “sync”.

8 ) Your friend, an accomplished builder, complains of tennis elbow although he does not play any sports. You try to tell him it could be his reflexive item scanning habits. He doesn’t
even respond when you mention trying to cut a prim or two out of every single, rock, bench, or tree really isn’t worth the time it takes to examine them- which he will systematically do everywhere you go mumbling about “prim conservation”.

9 ) The sim owner calls you a prim whore for using Temp on Rez.

10 ) Alll Santa Claus hats or ill-made sofas left in a sand box are probably shape deformers.

11 ) As an American you begin to use the metric system for land measurement and realize it is actually more efficient.

12 ) A new and ill-informed user comes in world interrupting a conversation with a friend and demands to be taken to the “sex rooms”. Your friend yawns and asks politely- “What species?”, explaining to the neophyte that it pays to be very specific on the grid.

13 ) You can’t wait to get home to rez your gifts.

14 ) You know that people wearing boxes are the defacto cultural signal of someone negotiating a complex GUI and not a fashion statement, or they may have no payment on file.

15 ) ‘xcite has nothing to do with search, but a place where some people go to upgrade their virtual sex life.

16 ) ll(insert crude word here) is really funny.

17 ) Marriage becomes partnering and usually lasts the span of an incubation cycle of sea monkeys. From start to dissolution it costs less than 50 cents if the Linden holds at 260.

18 ) You know that the Linden is a product and not currency.

19 ) Achieving orbit is normally a “bad thing” requiring you to re-log, although you may have tried a parachute more than once just to see how long it took.

20 ) Your friend tells you he has “won” Second Life. You ask him what level did he reach?

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